my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
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she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
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I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize