i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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