HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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