I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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