That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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