I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
