We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
