the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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