Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
