Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
you win again, gameday.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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