Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
The beer is more important than you right now.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
