There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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