First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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