I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize