i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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