I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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