I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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