Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
operation harelip BJ is a go
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
