I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
