never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
