Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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