I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
