Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
