I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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