So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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