He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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