That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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