Will you blow on my dice?
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize