We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
