Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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