It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
