it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize