Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
