rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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