The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
