I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
