do herpes really smell.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
