that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize
