Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
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