I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize
