Do you still have your period?
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
