He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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