Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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