Heybabeimwearingurpanties
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
