And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
