She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
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i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
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This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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