it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
