Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize