I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize
