All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
