Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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