This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
My Higher Power is John Stamos
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
